I'm at a point in my life where I have a plethora of things I could blog about.  And an abundance of time to blog about them.  Yet, I feel completely unmotivated to write in this thing.  I think it's pretty ironic myself.  I mean, there was a time when I would sit and look at this thing and be like "Gee, I wish I had something to write about so I can write in my Xanga and people can comment on it."  It's funny how times change.

I do love to write and am constantly on the lookout for a way to get my mediocre attempts at it out there.  But right now Xanga is only worth a once every two month update.

Well, to spice up this post and see if anyone actually uses Xanga anymore I'm going to bring back a classic: 

Ask me something, anything! (Preferably not something I can Google the answer to)

"When we stand before Jesus, he's not gonna ask us if we were accurately estimated.  He's not gonna ask us if we were appropriately applauded.  He's gonna ask us if we loved him, we loved each other, and through the love for him and the love for each other we made a way for the world to know that he lives." -Alicia Britt Chole

There is a new phenomena sweeping the nation (aka about 14 or 15 girls at the University of Missouri).  Thanks to yours truly, women everywhere are realizing they hold a gift.  This gift is "mandar."  As spokeswoman for mandar, I feel it is my duty to clear up any misconceptions about mandar.  First, I'll start with the official definition:

Mandar [man-DĂR]
noun
Sense of ones "surroundings." Found to be most effective in coffeeshops and at Christian conferences. Usually least effective in shopping malls and during football games and pompous jerk festivals. Not to be confused with manscope.

© Britani Siebeneck 2008

Myth: If you see a "hot" guy, it means your mandar has gone off.

Fact: Okay, first of all, can I just say that I don't like calling men "hot."  I mean "hot" is what you call Jonathan Taylor Thomas when you're 11 years old and it's 1997.  I almost like the term "cute," better.  Moving on... so why doesn't seeing a good looking guy mean your mandar has gone off?  Well, simply put, everyone (i.e. everyone physically able to see this post) has eyes and can see.  The only thing required to be able to know if a guy is good looking is the ability to see him.  And the probability of the good looking guy you see being a complete meat-head, is probably fairly high.  And mandar is never set off by a meat-head.

Myth: Mandar is the ability to distinguish whether or not a man is in the room.

Fact: We don't need mandar to know that just any random guy is in the room.  I'm sure we've all taken a biology course at some point in our lives and thus have the ability to distinguish between the two primary genders. 

Myth: You should wear pants with the word "juicy" or any other kind of writing on the butt.

Fact: Okay, so this doesn't really have that much to do with mandar, but I feel it is an issue that needs to be addressed.  Meat-head is already very visual.  Meat-head probably already notices that you do indeed have a butt.  Meat-head does not need any more encouragement to look at your butt.  If your mandar goes off while wearing these type of pants I can assure you that you should go home and put on some Levi's before you even think about opening your mouth and saying "hi."

Other helpful hints:

Once you are married or in a committed relationship, say good-bye to mandar.

For those who enjoy the occassional brewskie, do not drink and operate mandar at the same time.

For those who enjoy getting very, very drunk all the freakin' time.  First of all, stop getting very, very drunk all the freakin' time and secondly if drunken parties are the only place where your mandar is given the ability to function, then this is not good.  Having mandar is like driving a car.  It can be a very good thing or (if you're drunk behind the wheel) a very, very bad thing.

Mandar is for being able to notice upstanding, quality gentlemen, not future make out buddies.

What's the difference between mandar and manscope?  Manscope is purposefully going somewhere specifically to look for men or scoping out a room trying to find men.  Mandar is simply knowing a good man when you see him.  If you have a good mandar, there is no need for manscope.

Finally, your "spiritual antenna" should always be on higher alert than your mandar.

I love to write.  I mean, write with a pen and paper.  Xanga is a bit more of a challenge.  Lately, I've been reading up on some ways to improve my writing.  Here is the most profound thing I've learned.  The muse is a lie.  Well, it exists.  But if you sit and wait for it, it probably won't come to you.  I kind of had a hunch about this and was relieved to see the experts feel the same way.

So what do they say?  Just write.  Write until something good comes out.  No one is going to see your first draft, except for you.  And that feeling of self-loathing that you have from writing something horrible your first 9 or 10 tries is totally worth it when you finally see your work turn into what you want. 

The action of writing in and of itself is enough to get the wheels turning in your brain.  If you wait around for profound ideas they'll probably come to you at the most inconvenient times (like while you're driving) and then you'll forget them.

So, the moral of the story is be open to ideas.  But write, whether you have a muse or not.   There have been plenty of times when I've gone into my writing with no inspiration, but then as soon as I put my pen on the paper my thoughts just kind of come out like a flood.  And there are pages and pages.  And when I write like that I get the same endorphin-y feeling I get after I exercise.  That's where the best writing comes from.  El fin.